Why travelling with kids at Christmas is great!
I used to belong to the school of thought that travelling with kids for Christmas Day was sacrilege. Mortel sin. A big fat NO GO area.
That children should be home, tucked into their beds, while visions of sugarplums dance in their heads…. Surrounded by their own familiar things and with all their family to celebrate the occasion together in a happy, harmonious and family-filled day.
Like in the films.
Except, that’s rarely how it actually happens.
I suppose this idea came from my own childhood Christmases. Magical and family filled to the extreme with uncles and aunties and great uncles and great aunties, grandparents and great grandparents and presents and food and endless piles of chocolate and nuts and stockings….for one whole day (ok, maybe a couple of days).
It really was a wonderful whirlwind in those early years. Little did I know at the time, what our parents went through to create this day for us each year.
Being a child of an NHS worker, my Mum would often work on Christmas Day, and she usually tried to arrange an early or late shift so she could spend part of the day with us, at least. I remember once, waking at 4am to open presents before Mum went to work for a full twelve hour shift. And so by the time I was about sixteen, I was co-ordinating the Christmas Day dinner for the family, and meticulously planning the recipes in advance with my brother, both of us already keen cooks, having parents who were usually still in work when we’d get home from school.
I used to look forward to the time when I could write the Christmas shopping list, mix the herbs, butters and spices and soak up Jamie Oliver and Nigella’s Christmas Cooking TV shows, and decide if it would be turkey or goose, Christmas Pudding, Cheesecake or Raspberry Bomb for dessert, or all three. My grandmother makes the best pavlova, so that was in the mix too!
I hosted Christmas Dinner for up to eighteen people, probably twenty years in a row with the odd year off in between. Even whilst juggling two little ones. And I always wanted to be the one to take charge, to make sure everything was just perfect and that everyone had the most special, magical day.
Everyone that is, except me.
And not for want of other people trying. When we had children, we naturally wanted to recreate this tradition for them each year and I just found it hard to relinquish control, wanting the girls to have the same family Christmas that I’d had growing up. But it was even harder to achieve whilst juggling work, and little ones with all their December school events and pulling off a faultless Christmas Bonanza. It took me years to even see the stress of this one day.
You reap what you sow?
At work, I have two adventure-seeking friends, who always took their children away for Christmas. They are some of the most wonderful parents I know, always somehow getting just the right balance in the parenting recipe. I used to wonder how they did it. On a practical and an emotional level.
But as I started to acknowledge the stress in the run up to Christmas and started to grow tired of feeling exhausted every Boxing Day, one year, I listened a bit more closely to their Christmas Story.
And this time, I clung to their words, when they said it was the best way to spend a simple family Christmas. To take away the stress and just enjoy the moment.
And with that, I was out.
Stepping out of Christmas.
“There is a flight on Christmas Eve.” I said, after stalking the flights for weeks. Easyjet’s scheduled flight had fallen on Christmas Day, the only day of the year the airline does not fly. And with that one flight out of the equation, demand for all the others during the school break had been sky high. And the prices to boot. I could not believe our luck. I caught the extra date the day it was released. It was as if someone up there was watching over us, and giving us a gentle nudge.
“Let’s do it.” Rhino said.
The previous year, the school Christmas holidays had been late and so we’d flown out to the Canaries on Boxing Day for ten nights. It was the most amazing surf and sunshine-filled trip and not the first time we’d gone away after Christmas. Before Koko and Kitty, we once had a few beers on Christmas Eve and booked flights on a whim to fly to Prague on Boxing Day. It turned out to be a brilliant trip!
But really, the 4am start on Boxing Day wrote most of Christmas Day off and we were both sitting there thinking we should have just gone away for Christmas in the first place. We still did the whole Christmas thing for the girls and all the clearing up that went with it. AND packed for a holiday for a family of four leaving at 4am on Boxing Day.
What were we thinking?!
We spoke to the girls to see what they thought about flying out on Christmas Eve. Kitty just needed to know that Santa would still find us wherever we were, but Koko was tougher to convince.
“I just want to be in my own bed, with the snow falling on the ground…
“It probably won’t be snowing.” I said
“well, ok, with the rain then, but I want to be here, in my bed in the cold and dark with the rain tapping on the window.”
I was still hopeful I could charm her into it, but there was no need. The next morning, she woke up and said “If you all want to go, I don’t want to stop you having fun, so I’ll come too.”
I hit confirm on the flights and sorted the accommodation, and we started to look forward to our very first Christmas abroad as a family. And then the excitement snowballed..!
Immediately, I felt the relief at not having to plan a thing, other than the trip, which felt like the best present to ourselves we’d ever bought. We scaled the whole thing down, gifts, decorations and all and we stepped out of Christmas.
It was the best thing we ever did.
We arrived to 30 degree sunshine on Christmas Eve, and after settling in we went for a balmy evening walk and an aperitif before a barbecue and Christmas Eve present at our apartment, with Carols from Kings on iPlayer and a candlelit G&T.
The girls woke to a light delivery from Santa and they couldn’t have been happier. We ate at our favourite Italian for Christmas dinner, before a sunshine surf on Christmas Day. No cooking, no dishes, no leftovers, and only a small pile of wrapping paper to clear up. It felt like the longest Christmas Day I can ever remember. Mostly because I didn’t really lift a finger and spent the whole day with my most favourite little gang, at the beach, in the sunshine. Also because the sun didn’t set until 6pm, a full two hours extra daylight than at home.
It was the most magical Christmas yet.
The best things in life….
Here’s the straw that broke the camel’s back – Christmas has just become too much about the stuff. And I really don’t want the ‘stuff’ cluttering up my house and my mind, for months either side of Christmas Day. That’s not what it’s all about. The whole frenzy over getting it right for weeks in the lead up, just makes me want to step out of Christmas even more. And in truth, in the UK at Christmas, it is usually dark, wet and cold so we’re all driven inside, eating, eating some more, getting merry and wondering why, come the New Year, we’re all in need of a good detox.
I didn’t want this way to become our tradition.
Before we took the kids away for Christmas, I was mostly worried about how they would feel. Would they miss the traditions? And the stuff? And extended family? And last year, due to Covid, our planned Christmas trip was cancelled. After our best Christmas yet in 2019, we were thrown back to spending Christmas here and really got to see the other side of the coin.
Less is more.
The girls said they missed being away for Christmas. They wanted the simple day we had and the many sunshine filled days that followed. And the real reason? Because that way, there are no distractions from the most important thing – being together.
Happy parents, happy kids.
They appreciated the warmth of the sunshine in the midst of our Welsh winter, finding shells together on the beach and laughing in the warm waves way more than any present they could have ever chosen.
Just like when I look back now on those big family Christmases, what I loved most were those quiet moments when everyone had left, and I got to have my parents all to myself again.
So just like that, this has become our new Christmas tradition. Less stuff, less fuss and more stress free time out travelling together. And I am fully on board with that!
Feliz Navidad!
